There I am, sipping on a cold frosted malted beverage (or reasonable facsimile) and some tosser decides to play Journey's "Don't Stop Believing" on the jukebox.
I'm not sure exactly when this phenomenon began, but at some point a couple of years ago I realized that there were a couple of songs following me around in my drunkenness. A couple of them belonged to the Doors (they'll get their own rant eventually) and a couple of them were "band du jour" type hits that were in fact so forgettable that I can no longer even quite pinpoint what they were.
Definitely not the case with this particular ditty.
Prior to moving to Los Angeles, I had no real qualms with Journey and their seismic power balladeering. In my mind they were relegated to the realm of pseudo-prog bands I didn't pay much mind to, like say Kansas or Styx, which meant I would occasionally refer to their brand of schlock-rock with some form of vague derision but essentially paid no mind.
Now, after literally hundreds, possibly thousands of listens, I can no longer afford that luxury.
As a musician, it's hard, closer to impossible, to find faults with the song. It is well crafted, well played and sung with a precision that's difficult to match even in this post-autotune age.
As a listener though, it's hard, close to incomprehensible, to figure out what the allure and repeat listening value of this little 80's trinket is.
First off, it makes no fucking sense, at least lyrically.
Initially, I thought the song was some sort of cornball epic ode to the pursuit of dreams, as evidenced by the lines you (unfortunately) know by heart and are already singing in your head:
"Just a small town girl, livin in a lonely world
She took the midnight train goin anywhere
Just a city boy, born and raised in south detroit
He took the midnight train goin anywhere"
Ok, I'm with you so far. Two dreamers take a train. We cool.
"A singer in a smokey room
A smell of wine and cheap perfume
For a smile they can share the night
It goes on and on and on and on"
Huh? Oh they're gonna hook up. Is the singer on the train? Is the singer the city boy? The small town girl? It generally takes more than a smile to share a night (maybe it was the 80's and coke helped), but ok, I get it, they fuck like rabbits.
Then this wonderful non sequitur:
"Strangers waiting, up and down the boulevard
Their shadows searching in the night
Streetlight people, living just to find emotion
Hiding, somewhere in the night"
It this an allusion to prostitution? Drugs? Or just cheap rock poetry about people, uh, wanting to fuck?
And, in case things weren't confusing enough, let's switch to first person for this diatribe:
"Working hard to get my fill,
Everybody wants a thrill
Payin anything to roll the dice,
Just one more time
Some will win, some will lose
Some were born to sing the blues (a line delivered in the least Delta way possible)
Oh, the movie never ends
It goes on and on and on and on"
And then, four minutes and twenty-one seconds of my life have been pissed away again and I am none the richer, or wiser, for it. Fuckin' A.
----
Lately, it's getting even worse. The song has been following me to karaoke, which is even more annoying as it joins the ranks of "songs that are really hard to sing but tone-deaf amateurs choose to try out in public anyway" and worse, their friends invariably "help" by adding "harmonies".
I've tried cornering folks on this subject to no avail. Most people don't even admit to liking it except in an "ironic" fashion, which puzzles me as they seem to know every phrase, lick and turnaround by heart. Geez, that seems a lot like, you know, actually liking the song.
Which I could at least understand and/or respect. But people seem to want to be "too cool" for this tune, even when it's the soundtrack to their private jokes and fun times. And every single time, apparently, they need to sing it as loud and off key as humanly possible, cheerfully congratulating each other in their caterwauling and reminiscing about how "crazy" they get on any given Friday night. Gag me with a spoon. Please.
And, invariably, I'm the humorless asshole that "doesn't get it". Wow.
I'm trying to learn something on this pilgrimage we call life. What is this song's purpose? Why does it follow me? Was it planted by my nemesis (some bastard who is presumably responsible) to annoy me or is it simply another by-product of my nonconformism that I get to feel alien and uncomfortable once a night, every night I go out, for the remainder of my natural days?
The best answer I can come up with? Oh the movie never ends, it just goes on and on and on and on...
